Jul 27, 2012

retrospect

i've realized a pattern in my personal journal writing.
i insert a lot of haha's. maybe even a few hahaha's.

but it's not to make the things i write any less awkward or try to make what i'm saying any easier for me to say it, which is the socially acceptable reason for the addition. i honestly do it because i know for a fact when i read my journals 10 or 15 years down the line, my life will seem pretty ridiculous. and the huge problems that i vent about will seem so petty. either that or i really do say something witty that i KNOW i'll still laugh at in 15 years. it's like i'm having a conversation with my future self. i think we'll be pretty good friends.

my life will be completely different in 15 years.
and currently; i am not who i will be.

Jul 23, 2012

rule of thumb

as of late, i've realized that i've learned a lot these past few years of my life.
it's cliche, but it's true:

highschool changes you.

1. You should never give someone the power to control your life. It's about making the best choices for YOU. And not because you're fearful about how they might react to it.

2. Jealousy is pointless. It's not about anyone but the insecurities you have with yourself. "Sometimes you're ahead, and sometimes you're behind. The road is long and hard, and in the end, it's only with yourself."

3. It is always better to be kind.

4. I want to get married. Don't worry, not YET. I've realized that i want to be married to someone who wants to marry the best version of me. And i'm not the best version of me yet. Isn't college an excellent place to figure out just exactly who and what i'm supposed to be, right? Right.

5. And lastly, heavenly father doesn't give you everything you want. Just because i've pictured how i want my life to be in my head, doesn't mean that's how it's gonna be. It took me a long time to realize that that is still ok. It doesn't mean he loves you anyless. It means he has something different instore for you. Something that can make you just as equally happy, or even more. I think that's definitely something i needed to learn this year for whatever reason. And i did.




Jul 12, 2012

official

it's official. i have a place to live this year. its a MIRCALE considering i signed up exactly one month ago.
i hope veronica and victoria are nice. :/ :/ :/
that can't really be their names, right?

knock on wood

i may need to knock on wood shortly.....BUT i just have to spill this.
i think i may finally, officially, 100%, know where i will be spending the next year of my life.



and if everything turns out as planned, i miiiight actually know where i'll be living.
:) :) :) :) :)
a weight has been lifted.
and it is because of prayer.